6DPO and hoping again

When trying to conceive, everything moves in slow motion. I can only be grateful that it continues to move. One day, and then another, toward possibility.

Today I had the smallest bit of spotting, which I think can only be implantation. Hope, which I'd kept in a back room, is front and center whether I want it there or not. In one week, I'll take a test. One day, and another, and another, toward possibility.

The Sharpest Lives

This is the way to wake up on a Tuesday morning.

Give me a shot to remember
And you can take all the pain away from me
A kiss and I will surrender
The sharpest lives are the deadliest to lead
A light to burn all the empires
So bright the sun is ashamed to rise and be
In love with all of these vampires
So you can leave like the sane abandoned me

My Chemical Romance

Suffering

I don't know why children get sick on holidays. I only know that I love my son more than my own life and his suffering is killing me. I will clean up gallons of vomit and dozens of terrible diapers. I will lay awake at 2 am on Christmas morning listening to his constant whimpering downstairs with his father. And I will never stop hurting until he's well again.